UC

My mom always tells me I have such an eloquent way with words and that I always put what needs to be said in the prettiest box with the biggest prettiest bow, and today I am writing this not because I want to, but because I need to, and I hope this is the most beautiful words I’ve written yet.

Charlie West, or known to me as Uncle Charlie, and UC (secret code name), has always struck me as awe-spiring. I remember as a little girl thinking, “He is such a rebel and has the most fun, He says what he wants, does what he wants, and has what he wants. I want to be just like him and Debby.”

I was a little different then than I am now…. I was petrified of EVERYTHING, new and change were NOT my friends, but UC always made me come out of my comfort zone. I remember at 8 years old when Debby and Charlie rode their motorcycles up to the lake for the first time and were planning on taking us kiddos for a ride. Never had I EVER been on a motorcycle, but he asked me if I wanted to ride and I couldn’t get on fast enough… If UC did it, I wanted to do it also! Just a few short years later, I was with the Dawson Gang scraping pegs through the West Virginia mountains wearing heated plug-in pants. I came a long way in that short amount of time!

The older I got the more UC and I got close. One thing I always loved about UC was his love of travel. I think that watching him plan his trips and flight plans and talk about his journeys is what gave me my need for adventure. I wanted to do all these awesome things and see all these exciting places that most people NEVER see but that UC always found marvelous and amazing. So the love of trips with Aunt Debby and UC began….

In 2005, we took a family vacation to France where we rented a boat and went down the river traveling through the small southern towns in France. We worked the locks and navigated our way through quaint little towns only knowing to order steak, frites, and coke. I remember going to the cutest own on top of a mountain that had an orange orchard maybe, anyways, we had the BEST ice cream sundaes at the top! UC made me try escargot because that’s what you do in France, right?

At about 15, me and my best friend went with Debby and UC White Water Rafting, oh my God, what fun that was! The whole entire trip was amazing! We rented a pontoon boat and spent a day on the lake and UC made incredible fun of us because in case you didn’t know, there in NO cellphone service in the valleys of WV. Now you could take me there and it would be a blessing but then, it certainly was not!

When I was 16ish we started flying a lot more together. The little Yellow Piper Cub was always my favorite. I would love when they flew into Clarksville, so we could fly over the lake and see it all from aerial view. After a few local trips I got really brave, and agreed to go to Oshkosh, WI in a 6 seater Piper Lance. I was scared TO DEATH! I am not crazy about airplanes, and honestly UC was the only person I really cared to fly with, but that many hours in a small airplane feeling every bump and crevice… I was petrified. It ended up being the most fun I’ve ever had! So much so that after that trip, we planned places to meet just so I could fly more (even taking the controls a few times) and to see Bob (whom I met at Oshkosh and got to hold his Lindy!)

Two years later I was back in Oshkosh for my second time and I was even more excited! I remember flying over Indiana, the first time I went, and falling in love. The flyover states are beautiful and I formed an absolute love for Indiana just from seeing it from above and eating there peanut butter cheeseburger. If you have never gone to the largest airshow in the world, you don’t really understand what adrenaline is, until you see tons of little planes around you and have no clue if there are any under or above you. When you land at Oshkosh you land on a dot… yes a DOT… you get on your dot then get off the runway. Period. Do not pass go or collect $200. When we were landing I remember hearing a little nervousness in UC’s voice and Debby becoming very matter of fact. “OH SH**!! If they are worried, I need to get worried real fast!” We were coming in to a really bad wind and UC was worried about our landing. Of course, we were fine, but it wasn’t smooth and I remember his relief when we got out. After setting up our tents and chairs we watched as many planes attempted the same landing but with a different result. “Gosh, I guess he was worried for a real big reason!” I laugh thinking about this trip because I have photos of UC sleeping under the wing of the plane, I laughed at him and then proceeded to my tent to fall asleep half in and half out…. That was a beautiful capri pant sun tan line. We went to the Shell tent had delicious food and snacks and watched the air shows. Me and Aunt Debby ran the runway 5K and complained to UC when all the choco milk was gone at the end. It was a great trip… the best!

In 2017, we went to South Dakota to meet Aunt Debby and UC soon after their retirement and official move to the open road. Me and UC texted a lot, even before the move, but we always kept in contact afterwards. I always got updates on the cool new places and adventures, but now I am here, with them and ready to see and learn new things! The stipulations to visiting was that we had to bring Duplin wine, I didn’t mind that at all, sitting down with UC to have a glass of his favorite Black River Red was what I longed for the most. I would give anything to have one more glass beside that campfire again. I was finally out west, totally out of my element, and excited as EVER! UC always told me how beautiful it was and how much he loved outwest. We talked about it a lot and I was so glad to finally be there. If I could go back in my life and do anything again, it would be that trip. I’d do it 100x over! One of my favorite parts was hiking around Devil’s Tower in Wyoming. The feeling, the place, the scenery, it was too breathtaking to even describe. We had lots of nights by the fire and eating dinner together that were absolutely amazing and memories now that get me through the hard days.

Since then UC always checks in with me. He knows my race schedule and is always sure to ask how my training is going, what big thing I am doing this weekend, and to make sure I am always having fun. In 2018, I decided to stop hiding behind the stigma and embrace that I had severe anxiety and depression with suicidal thoughts. I decided that I was going to create my own movement to stop others from feeling like they have to be alone or that they have to face this ugly thing in life alone. UC was one of the first people to know about my idea, and after I shared my struggles, he was always there to check-in and to remind me this life was worth living, and to stop stressing so much. He has always been my biggest cheerleader, he has always believed in me and had my back, he has always pushed me to do better.

After I started my movement I got a crazy idea to plan a trip across the country via bicycle, RV, and 30 days of open road. UC was the first person I thought of. In order to plan this feat, I need to learn how to read a map, know where the bicycle routes are, and I need to know the best way to navigate my way through west to east through central USA. For Christmas, I got an atlas from UC, and instructions on how to create routes and read the roads. Best present ever. UC has always understood my need of more. My drive to do more and be more… I guess I acquired it from him, a rolling stone that never collects moss. Now, I have to finish learning how to plot my routes with him on my shoulder.

Since UC got sick, it has been like a bad dream… a nightmare… In my head there were so many more days, so much more time, so many more adventures to be had… but our time has been cut too short. While in the hospital he told every single nurse, I was his niece and that if you ever had to pick a daughter to have, he would pick me. UC held my hand and said, “Well kiddo… we have had a lot of adventures together…” I told UC, “Yes we have, and we have so many more to go, you just have to get better!” I knew the truth, but I didn’t want it to be true- I wanted more memories, more adventures, more knowledge, but didn’t we all. I told UC I was going to Utah to do an ironman for him since it was one of his favorite states, but I told him he had to go with me. I know he won’t be there physically, but he will always be there in my spirit, in my adventures, and in my traveling tales.

In 2020, I am going to Utah, not only is it a dream, I am now obsessed with it. Searching and scoping for the race I want to do that fits in my schedule and the best ways to get there. It doesn’t change our situation, it doesn’t help lessen the blow or absorb any of the hurt, but it does let me have one more day planned to spend with my UC, it does help me spend more time basking in our memories together while I am training, and it does help drive me to do better and be the best I can be because this one isn’t for me… this one is for UC.

These words are missing so many fun memories, the traveling tales are shallow and missing a lot of the big, fun details, but I prefer to keep those memories locked safe in my heart as they will get me through the tough days. I love you Charlie West and all the precious memories you gave to me. I love all the lessons you taught me and the gypsy spirit you awakened in me. The drive you have given me to do better and be better is so strong and growing. I appreciate every single second you spent on helping me grow and the push to get out of my comfort zone and try new things. You were always the best bad influence ever! My adventures will not stop now, I hope that with you riding on my shoulder, we create more memories together, that your spirit will continue to push me, and that when I’m scared to try something new, you give me that little extra push to just shut up and take the dive. I wrote this poem just for you, it’s not long but short and true. I can’t believe I had to write it, but here goes nothing…..

Little Yellow Airplane

You lived your life strong and fast

But the lifeline was cut too soon at last

You’ll stay with us through future stories

As we make new memories in honor of all your glories

And if I know you like I think I do

We will never be alone as you will always be there too

Too many adventures will miss your laugh

Too many trips will have an empty spot left

One thing I loved about your spirit

Was all the joy for travel wrapped up in it

A rolling stone is what you were

Never letting moss settle or adventures defer

I’ll pick up right where you left off

Creating memories and keeping the fun aloft

Your memory will be as strong as your character

Never leaving us and always giving more to remember

And though you won’t be here today

I find comfort knowing you are somewhere flying your little yellow airplane

I won't let my story end, because now, I have to adventure enough for the two of us.

P<3